So tonight, I was cleaning the porch area of the kid's section. All of a sudden I hear a crash. I was hoping to God that no kids were hurt. I walked around the corner and there was a woman on the floor and our picnic table was flipped over. I ran over to her to make sure she was ok. She apologized so much for SITTING on the table and placing stuff all over it. She apologized profusely. I told her it was ok and not the end of the world. I looked on the floor and a baby car seat carrier was laying there. I was hoping to God there was no baby in it and there was not. I told her not to worry and we could replace the table and possibly even fix it. I was very sincere. Well...during my dinner, Amanda, my manager, came in and said "Patrick...don't worry...I know you were nice...but the big lady who sat on the table, her husband just got in my face and said you were so rude to his wife. She said she tripped and fell into the table." Now, mind you...this was probably lied about because of embarrassment...and that is ok. But to say I was rude when I did nothing but make sure was ok...what a bia. So Amanda continues: "She said you got all huffy and puffy with her. Her husband is furious and I calmed him down a lot. He said he wanted to see you and he knew the guy upstairs (cashier) had his hand on the phone because he was ready to call 911 (actually he was going to page a manager to let her know the guy needed to speak to her) because I am a big black man." Now let's reflect for a moment. Big black man. Why are you going to pull that? What is that saying? Really? Not good. First of all...no one even cares if you are a big purple man...the fact is that no one is scared of you at all. In fact, if you so much laid a finger on anyone, no matter if you were a big black man or a 95 lb white woman, the police are getting called and a lawsuit will ensue. What stupidity. So the conversation continues: Amanda said "Sir, you need to calm down. No one here was belligerent to your wife and no one would ever be ugly, especially Patrick." He says "Well I work here at the mall." Amanda says "What are you security?" "NO. I work for the Apple Store." Ok...pause number two. You work for the apple store and you are all of a sudden something? What are you going to do? Pull the iPad out of your cootie (iPad) and slap us around a bit with it? No. Plus, I wouldn't be running around telling everyone telling everyone I work for Mac to try to prove my point. It would be the same as me getting in a bar fight and saying "Oh yeah, I am the Children's Lead Bookseller at Barnes and Noble." What a tool. So Amanda says after his Apple comment "Well then you should know then about respecting property. Our tables are not for sitting on. This is why we have chairs. We don't come to your store and sit on your product. Plus, we have a big even coming on Saturday that will probably benefit your store." Well, he decides to be all big and wants to know what the Hell Barnes and Noble did that was interesting. Amanda says "Ozzy and Sharon Osborne are coming and if you would like business and for us to promote people coming to your store, I suggest you calm down." He rants a little and she tells him "Honestly sir, we laughed a lot when we learned your wife broke the table. Things in life happen and it is ok. We are not going to make a big deal out of it because it isn't. It is just something that happens and it gave us a little bit of action in the store tonight." So, after all that was said, he was calmed a little. Amanda still warned me not to go out to the sales floor for a bit. I guess she thought my short self was going to get killed. HAHA. Oh well. I guess I learned something DON'T SIT ON DISPLAYS IN STORES. Anyone not raised by sea anemones should know this.
Oh what a day. Barnes and Noble scores another fun night. But the best part was what happened after. Every Thursday night, a really nice lady comes to our store to work on the accounting work for her business she runs. She always comes to kids to use the table to lay out her stuff. She never comes in until after 10 and it always takes her til 10 minutes after we close to get out. Usually, store managers run her out of kids and make her go to cafe. I don't mind her down there as long as no kids are around that want to use the table to read. She is very pleasant. Well...after the table broke, one of my co-workers said "PLEASE let me know when the accountant comes in. I want to see her expression when she sees the table is not there." This co-worker is awesome. She is never like this, but there was a mischievous look in her eyes. I could hear the song Schadenfreude as she was talking about it. She really wanted accountant to walk in and wanted to see her face drop. Well, I was minding my own business when my co-worker ran up to me and did a total impersonation of accountant when she walked in. It was hilarious. She showed me how she held all of her stuff and how she freaked out that the table was not there. It gave my co-worker so much pleasure. HAHA. I wish this was as funny written as it actually was in person. My co-worker was on the soap opera Another World for five years and is great at doing impersonations and creative things. So it was amazing seeing that...and it was fun watching her cut loose.
So...BROM. HAHA. Peter Pan and his Devils.
The book is fantastic. I would say very gruesome but so interesting. I kind of feel as though I am in it. So far, I have gotten up past 200 pages. Still 200 to go. I am enjoying it.
A lot of background info is given on Peter. You learn of his first time in Avalon and how he was lured into a witch's lair. The whole episode is slightly sexual...in a vampiric way with biting and blood and all of that. The witch is one of the "elements" representing nature in Avalon. Although she is bad, she is there to balance out life on the island. Peter does something gruesome to her (you can read it. I won't give it all away) and manages to get away. After, he is intercepted by Modron, Queen of the Mist. She is the other part of the island representing the water (her sister is the witch). Modron is delighted to find Peter because he is a replacement son from the one she lost. The only worry is that she is always obsessing over her lost son when she needs to be concentrating on saving Avalon from man-kind. This whole theme of man destroying everything pops into here. It reminds me of Avatar in a way. Christianity is causing all magic things to be wiped out. Druids, pagans and the like are all slayed. Without them, magic cannot be sustained. Ulfger (a nephew of Modron) is concerned about the balance of life with all of the unusual magical creatures of Avalon. He is afraid all of her obsessing is going to get them all killed. Ulfger is not much older than Peter but is extremely mature and wants things to change. He wants everyone to fear the mystical creatures of Avalon and learn they cannot be destroyed.
As Peter's childhood story is being told, his current story parallels. We see him pass through Brooklyn trying to recruit more kids. He ends up finding one, but loses him to the mist. This really enrages Peter.
Also, we see what is happening with Nick. Nick meets several characters since I last wrote. He is New Blood to the Devils and is forced to do dirty work with the newbies Leroy, Cricket and Danny. Leroy is head of the new kids...he has not been turned into a Devil yet because he has done no deed that can warrant it (which is saving a life, defending yourself, etc.). He is jealous of Nick in his training. Leroy turns out to be a total bastard ass and is quite ugly to him. He even kills a pixie Nick is feeding at the dinner table. During this time, Nick is being trained by the equivalent of Tiger Lily from Disney's movie: Sekeu. Sekeu is a native to the island and is almost like the leader of the Devils. She explains the magic in everything and how one becomes a Devil. Nick has to start training immediately (training for what is not specified even though the reader knows it is for combat). Nick doesn't feel he is a fighter but she pushes him. He is able to prove himself on a food hunting expedition one day.
Nick also learns the ages of the kids there. Peter is around 1400 years old, Abraham an escaped slave from the Civil War and Redbone a hippie from the 60's. He learns the food has a "magic" to it that helps keep them young. Well, actually everything has this magic.
I am strongly recommending this book to everyone. Although it is gruesome at points, it is well worth it. I am glad I went for it and thank you Angie for the rec!
So, this Saturday is Ozzy and Sharon Osborne at Barnes and Noble. I am excited to be working it! His new book I Am Ozzy ($26.99) is being featured and signed. I am just excited to see them both. I really respect Sharon for all of the crap she has had to put up with over the years. It is good to see he has really come through things, along with the two of their kids Jack and Kelly. I am proud that they have made it so far and gone through so much. We all make mistakes and have to get through it! Perseverance. And now, look at Sharon. She is keeping all of us entertained on Primetime television. Awesome. I hope she brings Mindy. The signing will be on Saturday. Here is the information: Old Orchard Barnes and Noble Events
Next week, we will have Elizabeth Kostova, author of The Swan Thieves and The Historian, come to our store. We will also have Newbery Award winning author Rebecca Stead sign on Saturday, February 6! I am so excited for all the fun!
So, as you know, next week is my "C" week. I have chosen a classic that I have never read but want to see all of the craziness myself. I will begin Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. I am very excited to do this, especially with Tim Burton's take starring Johnny Depp coming in March. I hear the book is quite creepy. After reading Brom, I won't be surprised and that is fine with me! I am ready to see what Carroll has in store for us! The version I have purchased is published by Penguin. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass. The book is in trade paperback for $14.00. B&N membership saves you $1.40. LOL. It is nicely illustrated and the book looks attractive itself. I hope is is a fun week of reading. Do not expect Disney from what I hear. Disney has to make things light-hearted. I believe Burton will be closer to the text in his new movie.
Well...gotta move my car at 7AM and then go to the gym, car shop and Verizon. Fun! FUN! FUN!!!! Have a lovely night. :)
Props for using 'sea anemones' and spelling it correctly! :) I think the word 'anemones' should be used more often because it is such fun to say and they are such neat critters.
ReplyDeleteI'd say that I don't believe your story, except that I do. HA! Very funny!! I had to tell a couple of teenagers who were making out hot and heavy on my stage that that was completely inappropriate behavior for any public place, much less a children's department. Especially since there was a grandma and two little kids playing in my department. Of course, it turns out that these teens were *with* the grandma and littles. The boy actually picked up the girl and carried her out of the store. He only staggered a little bit!
Oh dear lord. I have been kicking them out right and left lately. Teacher Patrick is back.
ReplyDeleteWow... amazing! Next time I visit I plan on sitting on ALL the tables in B&N!
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